To date, this is probably the hardest time I’ve had figuring out the dialogue for a page. I knew what I needed to say, but I had a lot of trouble with the whole “how much is too much” dilemma. At one point there was a lot less, for a while there was a lot more. In the end, I think I found the right balance. Hopefully!
oh my god the dialogue is killing me lol
“if there’s another way you want me to go” hahaha amazing
Definitely found the right balance
Glad to hear it! The dialogue in this whole chapter is especially tricky, since it’s hard to figure out exactly how much I can get away with saying. Or maybe more accurately, how little.
I wonder what the original version looked like. Since there are no second takes in real life.
Well one thing I kept going back to was that Daniel responded with “I’ve been trying to get you to stop going straight all night.” I think it’s kinda funny, but I decided it was a little too on-the-nose.